What if I finish last?

One of the biggest fears that I hear when working with clients is something along the lines of “I’m worried that everyone else will be better" or "I might finish last."

It's not surprising. The handful of athletes who cross the line first get all the attention. But by definition, they're the minority. Everybody else is also doing something just as hard, covering the same distance, on the same course, the same day. We just don't hear about them.

A few days ago, Mara, one of the women in my TriActivate Membership shared how race day hadn’t gone according to plan for her. She'd had to walk far more of the run than she’d hoped, and at first was disappointed.

What followed was a beautiful and inspiring conversation between those in the Membership about what racing means for them.

I’m sharing some of their comments here (with their permission) in the hope that it might inspire you or help your reframe some of your fears around race day.

Mara told the others in the Membership that after reflecting on her race she went from being disappointed to realising how much she’d actually achieved:

"I'm really not a 'sporty' person, and when we talked about me doing a triathlon a couple of years ago, the idea was a bit of a laugh. But I've just done my first ever Olympic distance tri!"

Her family were so proud of her, and when she moved on from focussing on her finishing time, she saw that the fact that she achieved her goal and proved to herself she could do it was far more important.

What if everyone is better than me on race day?

Standing at a start line surrounded by club kit and expensive bikes, it's easy to decide "everyone here is better than me, I don't belong."

But how do you actually know whether they’re better? And what does it matter anyway? Does their experience define what you can achieve?

If there’s any comparison worth making, don’t look at the person overtaking you on the bike, but everyone who’s still on the sofa who never signed up. You already did the hardest part.

As Lydia, another member pointed out to Mara:

“Think how many people never even have the guts to stand on the start line of an Olympic tri. Yet you crossed the finish line! Don’t forget that most people will never do a triathlon of any sort!”

What if I’m last to cross the finish line?

Someone always has to come last. But it’s up to you whether you decide that’s a bad thing.

Last weekend, Lydia did her first trail race. She was deliberately keeping it easy ahead of her first triathlon the following week. By her own admission she’s not the fittest or the fastest. But instead of worrying about that, she chose to focus on the positives:

"I made some new mates at the start line and we did it together. I didn't want to go hard, so instead I went out for time on feet... the views... and to prove to myself that the back of the packers belong everywhere."

I love this. The start line belongs to us all. And by definition, there are just as many people at the back as the front.

Marissa, another Triactivate Member shared her experiences of coming last in a triathlon last year. It was far from being the worst nightmare so many people worry about - she got a massive cheer over the line, and Ali Brownlee even presented her with her finisher's medal!

And instead of giving up and deciding she wasn’t good enough, she’s gone on to have a great time racing her first Half Ironman aquabike this year.

Inspiring others

Marissa got more support crossing the line than the winner did - and I bet she inspired far more people to think "maybe I can do this" and stand on a start line themselves than the winner did.

As Lydia put it:

"For me it's so much more than speed. It's about making it to the start line to show others that they can do it too. The people that you inspire won't care if you walked in the run, came last, fell off your bike or didn't break any records. The people you inspire are too busy being inspired, and finding a confidence that they can do it too."

This can be even more powerful when children see what we can achieve. Mara shared how her son was so inspired seeing her race a few months ago that he's now signed up to race at the York Tri this weekend - while her two-year-old was running around the garden pretending to swim, bike and run.

What’s most important on race day

So at your next race, leave the worry about your time, your body, your bike, or who's watching, at home. Race for yourself, not for anyone else.

Doing something hard and proving to yourself you can do it doesn't stay in your trisuit. It follows you into the parts of life that have nothing to do with racing - the difficult conversation you've been avoiding, the job application, the next hard thing.

So go out there, believe in yourself, and most importantly, enjoy it.

If you’d like to be part of a supportive community of female runners and triathletes who support and inspire each other, plus all the other benefits of membership, including Masterclasses, Q&As and coaching, find out more about the TriActivate Membership here.